> Number One Idiot, so far in 2014
> I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the
> poison control centre. Today, this woman called in very upset because she
> caught her little daughter eating ants. I quickly reassured her that the
> ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her daughter into
> the hospital. She calmed down and at the end of the conversation happened
> to mention that she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to
> kill the ants. I told her that she better bring her daughter into the
> emergency room right away..
> Number Two Idiot so far in 2014
> Early this year, some Boeing employees on the airfield decided to steal a
> life raft from one of the 747s. They were successful in getting it out of
> the plane and home. Shortly after they took it for a float on the river,
> they noticed a Westpac Rescue Helicopter coming towards them. It turned
> out that the chopper was homing in on the emergency locator beacon that
> activated when the raft was inflated. They are no longer employed at
> Number Three Idiot so far in 2014
> A man, wanting to rob a Bank of Queensland , walked into the Branch and
> wrote 'Put all your muny in this bag.' While standing in line, waiting to
> give his note to the teller, he began to worry that someone had seen him
> write the note and might call the police before he reached the teller's
> window. So he left the Bank and crossed the street to the NAB Bank. After
> waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note to the teller. She read
> it and, surmising from his spelling errors that he wasn't the brightest
> light in the harbour, told him that she could not accept his stickup note
> because it was written on a Bank of Queensland deposit slip and that he
> would either have to fill out a NAB deposit slip or go back to Bank of
> Queensland. Looking somewhat defeated, the man said, 'OK' and left. He was
> arrested a few minutes later, as he was waiting in line back at the Bank of
> Queensland. Happened in Noosa!
> Number Four Idiot so far in 2014
> A guy walked into a little corner store with a shotgun and demanded all of
> the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the
> robber saw a bottle of Scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the
> shelf. He told the cashier to put it in the bag as well, but the cashier
> refused and said,
> 'Because I don't believe you are over 21.' The robber said he was, but the
> clerk still refused to give it to him because she didn't believe him. At
> this point, the robber took his driver's licence out of his wallet and
> gave it to the clerk. The clerk looked it over and agreed that the man was
> in fact over 21 and she put the Scotch in the bag. The robber then ran from
> the store with his loot. The cashier promptly called the police and gave
> the name and address of the robber that she got off the licence. They
> arrested the robber two hours later.
> Number Five Idiot so far in 2014
> A pair of robbers entered a record shop nervously waving revolvers. The
> first one shouted, 'Nobody move!' When his partner moved, the startled
> first bandit shot him..
> Number Six Idiot so far in 2014
> Seems this guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just
> throw a brick through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So
> he lifted the brick and heaved it over his head at the window. The brick
> bounced back knocking him unconscious. It seems the liquor store window
> was made of Flexi-Glass... The whole event was caught on videotape. Perth
> WA .
> IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE:
> My daughter went to a local McDonalds and ordered a burger.. She asked the
> person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'
> He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.. Happened in Surfers
> Paradise !
> IDIOT SIGHTING:
> I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee
> 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?
> To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
> He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.' Happened in Melbourne
> JUST AN IDIOT:
> When my husband and I arrived at a car dealers to pick up our car, we were
> told the keys had been locked in it.
> We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly
> to unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I
> instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.
> 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'its open!' His reply, 'I know - I
> already done that side.'
> This was at the FORD main dealership.